I Think He's Married - or Engaged

Dee from Cheektowaga, NY writes:

"Im in love with this guy but we are from different countries.   I’m from America but he’s from Pakistan. We’ve known each other for a year now and we are considered as lovers. He always says he loves me but I have a feeling he has a fiance waiting for him back home or he’s married back there . When I asked him he said no because he’s only 21. He said that his mom wants him to go back there in this summer in June to get engaged, but he acts like he has feelings for me.  What I’m trying to figure out is should I end the relationship?  And if I should break up with him how can I do it without me wishing to be back with him?"

Nancy's Relationship Advice:

Dear Dee,

It is time you  had a serious discussion with this guy and get a straight answer from him about his marital status.  Either you already have the information you need or your intuition is telling you that he is not available.  Whatever the case, you need to know before this relationship goes any further.  

If he is either getting engaged this summer, already engaged, or even married, you must end it right now.  There is no ideal way to break up with someone and not have a few lingering feelings of  heartbreak.  You have given this person a part of your heart and that always causes a feeling of loss even though you initiate the breakup and have a desire to move forward with your life.  Even with that in mind, you must end it because you will not be able to find true and lasting love while in a relationship with someone who is not available.

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