Is this love?

Jessica from Harrodsburg asks:

 

"This guy that I like just recently agreed to be my boyfriend. The only problem is, we don't live in the same state, neither of us have a car, and he seems to have lost his sex drive. I believe it may be because before we got together, whenever he wanted to engage in phone sex, I didn't really give him the impression that I wanted it, though I did it anyway. So my question is, what are some things I can do to help him get his sex drive back, or what can I do to make him desire me again?"

Nancy's Relationship Advice:

Dear Jessica,

Long distance relationships are a challenge to keep alive at best and you give the impression that this guy really is not ready emotionally, physically or spiritually to engage in this type of commitment. I do encourage you to take a look at what you want out of a relationship and make definite goals about the type of person you want to attract into your life.  Physical intimacy is something that should be shared within a marriage and it is through dating that you find a person who brings the qualities and characteristics that are appealing to you.  There is nothing wrong about saving yourself for the right person and being committed to high standards for what you have to offer in a future committed relationship.  Showing yourself respect is the only way to have other people treat you with respect.  I know this may seem like a relationship to you, but it is not and you are too young to devote a lot of time, energy and effort into trying to make yourself into a fantasy image for this guy and engaging in activities you do not want to do.  There is a wonderful guy who will love you as much as you love him and will not ask you to do things that are degrading and inappropriate.

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