Can Friendship Turn into Commitment?

Ray from Bowie asks:

"I love this girl sincerely and she likes me as well. We became friends first and have been dating for five months now. We are both extremely close have great time and do almost everything together. However, she does not want a commitment or relationship at this point. I really like this girl so should I keep investing time and hope this turns into a commitment or back off from the relationship completely?"

Nancy's Relationship Advice:

Ideally one begins love with a friendship and that commitment evolves into a relationship. It is wonderful that you have this knowledge at a young age as many times people approach love based on physical attraction only. I encourage you to have a frank discussion about your feelings and be very clear about where you stand and your relationship goals with her. If you believe you have made your intentions abundantly clear and still are faced with her unwillingness to commit to you, I advise that you consider ending the relationship.

Many people try to go back to being just friends after they have crossed the line into love. I can tell you from my vast experience that approach does not work in general. There is always one person who wants more from the relationship and the other person who is happy with the arrangement. You can experience love with a woman you share a deep friendship with and certainly deserve that in a long term relationship.

If this door to love does not open for the long term, I can assure you that by taking a stand and declaring that you are unwilling to settle for less than you deserve, you will find that the right door to love will open before you know it. By staying with a woman who is unwilling or unable to commit, you raise the possibility of forming a relationship pattern that could be unhealthy emotionally in the long run and difficult to break.

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